Focusing on Who God Says I Am

After almost forty years of walking with God I would have thought that I would believe what God says about me. Nope! I know it, but I haven't really believed. I still see my flaws instead of all that God is making me. It is time to get my eyes off of myself and on God.

As I drove home from church one Sunday, I listened to a pastor teaching on God's habit of changing names. Abram became Abraham, Sarai - Sarah, Jacob - Israel, Saul - Paul to name a few.

This pastor went on to say that many people go by names from their past even though God has given them new names. No longer are we lazy, worthless, stupid, slow, ugly, fat, scrawny. You probably have a few of your own.

God doesn't call us those things. He calls us Beloved, Beautiful, Righteous, Blameless. He knows you by name and has always loved you.

Psalm 139 says you are fearfully and wonderfully made.
Psalm 45 says you are beautiful.
Psalm 34 says you are radiant when you look to Him.
1 John 3 says you are His beloved child.
2 Corinthians 3 says you are becoming like him.

Zephaniah 3:17 has been one of my favorite verses for a long time. Take a few minutes to meditate on how much He loves you and cares for you.

"The Lord your God is with you,
     (Always.)
He is mighty to save.
     (Whether it is out of a difficult situation or in the midst of it, or out of your own despair.
       He is BIGGER than whatever you are going through.)
He will take great delight in you,
     (I know, you feel like you have made a huge mess of things - but God still delights in who you are
       and who you can be, who He created you to be.)
=> This is my favorite part right now:
He will quiet you with His love,
     (Do you, like me, get anxious?
       Are you feeling unsettled or abandoned?
       God wants to calm your anxious thoughts and give you peace.)
He will rejoice over you with singing.
     (Can you believe it?
       He rejoices over you!
       Even though you yell at your kids sometimes
       and don't always have time for your husband
       and you haven't really taken time to pray this week, much less actually open your Bible.)

He loves you because you are you and
HE MADE YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE.

When I forget who I am in Him:
-My failures overwhelm me and make me feel useless.
-Anxieties multiply because I don't feel "good enough".
-My past haunts me.
-Fear keeps me from stepping out and trying new things.
-I give up!

These are the times it is especially important to read my Bible. The times when we feel least like spending time with God are usually when we need it the most. I am especially grateful at these times that I have marked verses in my Bible that are meaningful to me. That makes it easy for me to find where God has spoken to me before.

If you don't know where to start try Psalms.

Redeemed by Big Daddy Weave really spoke to me recently.

The chorus says:

"I am redeemed, You set me free
So I'll shake off these heavy chains
Wipe away every stain, now I'm not who I used to be
I am redeemed, I'm redeemed."

Walking by faith

This is a very challenging time for me. Our youngest has started college and our older children are beginning to step out on their own. I've spent twenty five years raising our family and now I need to find what God is leading me to do with the next twenty five years. I've been anxious and unsettled about the future because I want to see what my life will look like years from now instead of  looking for what God is asking me to do today. I'm living by sight, not by faith.

When I think about living by faith, I think of Abraham’s journey with God which was filled with times when he had to walk by faith. Hebrews 11:1 defines faith this way: "Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen." (NASB)

Abraham's life reveals the way to follow God a day at a time. Only the eyes of faith could see that seemingly impossible things would come to pass in Abraham and Sarah’s lives. I can’t imagine having to leave my home and family to follow God to an undisclosed land. He must have met tremendous  resistance from his family and friends. How many times was he tempted to give up and turn back as the difficulties of the journey overwhelmed him?

Not only did God promise Abraham land, but numerous descendants. Abraham and Sarah were already old. That must have seemed impossible, but Abraham chose to believe God when there was no human way for them to have a child. When they finally had their precious son who restored laughter to their lives, God told Abraham to sacrifice him. The Bible doesn't reveal his internal struggle, but it must have been fierce. Why would God give this child only to take him away? Without Isaac, how would the promise be fulfilled? Abraham trusted God, believing in resurrection long before it had been seen.

Faith wasn’t dependent on anything Abraham had to offer, or on his limited human abilities. Faith depends only on how trustworthy the object of our faith is. God’s promises are always true – He is completely trustworthy and faithful. If we have enough faith, we will trust Him for everything. Because we have a God who is always faithful, we have no need to fear. This requires keeping our eyes on God and not our circumstances. My anxiety can be a thing of the past if I learn to walk by faith.

God had a plan. He knew what was on the horizon even though Abraham couldn’t see what was to come. God revealed His plan to Abraham a little at a time, when the time was right. Abraham trusted and took one step at a time.

"Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord,
And whose trust is the Lord.
For he will be like a tree planted by the water,
That extends its roots by a stream
And will not fear when the heat comes;
But its leaves will be green,
And it will not be anxious in a year of drought
Nor cease to yield fruit." Jeremiah 17:7-8 (NASB)

He has a plan for my life too. And He will reveal His plan as I need to know the details. I can choose to trust and follow Him in faith and help bring His plan to pass, or I can walk by sight and fumble around in anxiety and insecurity hindering God’s plan. It is up to me.

Keith and Kristyn Getty's song By Faith shares how the theme of faith is woven through God's word. The chorus says:

We will stand as children of the Promise.
We will fix our eyes on Him, our soul's reward.
'Til the race is finished and the work is done.
We'll walk by faith and not by sight.

Here is the video of the entire song:

The Well - A Place to be Refreshed

 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30 NIV)

I don't know how many times I return to these verses when I have run out of my resources and am worn out. It would seem like after thirty five years of walking with God, I would know better than to try to accomplish everything by my strength; that I would stop to ask God about His plans for my day, instead of plunging ahead with my own. Some days or weeks or occasionally longer I do better, but then life gets busy and I run off ahead of God again - praying He will bless my plans instead of considering His.

When our kids were in school, this time of year was especially hectic. It takes time to settle into a school day and homework routine, fall sports are starting, then there is back to school night and those things the kids need that weren't on the school supply list. 

If you have run out of steam and are running on empty, why not take five minutes to meet Jesus at the well of living water and listen to this song by Casting Crowns. The first time I heard it, it stopped me in my tracks. 

" I have what you need,
But you keep on searchin,
I've done all the work,
But you keep on workin,
When you're runnin on empty,
And you can't find the remedy,
Just come to the well."

Casting Crowns

The Well

In The Garden

As I sat on the deck a couple of weeks ago, this hymn came to me:

 

In The Garden by C. Austin Miles
photo by Kristi Blackwood

At the time, I didn't know what God was beginning to do in our 18 year old's heart. (She wrote about it in her blog post, Changing My Plans). She came to me last week and said that she believed God was calling her to withdraw from the college she was enrolled in. (I was ready to spend two weeks shopping and packing to take her to this out of state school.) Instead she will enroll in the nursing program at our community college in preparation for the mission field. This plan allows her to graduate debt free so she won't have to work to pay off loans before she can pursue God's call.

Change isn't easy for me. I had just gotten adjusted to her leaving, now I have to readjust to having her home (which is not a bad thing). There is time to get her enrolled in fall classes, but not much. It will be a scramble to take care of admissions, enrolling in classes and getting books. I need those quiet moments with God every day to respond to whatever change the day brings with grace and to live with the peace and joy God desires for me.

I still love the old hymns I grew up singing. They tend to speak to my heart in quiet moments. There is a beauty and poetry in the lyrics that is missing in much of today's worship music.

Lord I Need You

I've been reading Ezekiel lately. This Old Testament prophet has reminded me again of how God kept calling Israel back to Him. They kept turning their backs on Him and chasing after the gods and ways of the cultures in the area where they had settled. God loved them so much that every time His children ran away, He pursued them and restored His relationship with them.

I'm struggling right now with the mistakes I've made, especially as a parent. We have a wedding coming up next summer and the joy that should mark this time is being marred by strained relationships. There were things I knew I was letting slide over the years that have resulted in distance between our children. I pray they will work through their differences soon and enjoy close friendships.

Like the Israelites, I need to ask for forgiveness from God and those I have hurt. Then I need to move forward knowing that God will meet me where I am, and guide me to where I should be. He loves me and longs for a relationship with me. God is for me and wants to help me to succeed.

God's word has also been reminding me that regardless of whether I am a full time homemaker, employed full time or somewhere in between, my true calling is to show God's love to everyone He brings into my path.

God teach me your ways.
Teach me to number my days.
Teach me to let go of self centered ways.
Teach me to love without fear.

The song Lord I Need You has been running through my head a lot lately. The only way I'll make it through each day is to acknowledge my dependance on God.

"Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You ."

                                           

Forever God's Child

This song has made a profound impression on me as our church's worship team has been preparing it for a future Sunday morning. It mirrors my journey with God. Here is the first verse:

Broken and lost you found me
Though hurt had been my way you healed my life.
Called as a child and righteous
You broke the power of sin and freed my heart.
(Find the whole song here.)

I hope it blesses you as well.