Focusing on Who God Says I Am

After almost forty years of walking with God I would have thought that I would believe what God says about me. Nope! I know it, but I haven't really believed. I still see my flaws instead of all that God is making me. It is time to get my eyes off of myself and on God.

As I drove home from church one Sunday, I listened to a pastor teaching on God's habit of changing names. Abram became Abraham, Sarai - Sarah, Jacob - Israel, Saul - Paul to name a few.

This pastor went on to say that many people go by names from their past even though God has given them new names. No longer are we lazy, worthless, stupid, slow, ugly, fat, scrawny. You probably have a few of your own.

God doesn't call us those things. He calls us Beloved, Beautiful, Righteous, Blameless. He knows you by name and has always loved you.

Psalm 139 says you are fearfully and wonderfully made.
Psalm 45 says you are beautiful.
Psalm 34 says you are radiant when you look to Him.
1 John 3 says you are His beloved child.
2 Corinthians 3 says you are becoming like him.

Zephaniah 3:17 has been one of my favorite verses for a long time. Take a few minutes to meditate on how much He loves you and cares for you.

"The Lord your God is with you,
     (Always.)
He is mighty to save.
     (Whether it is out of a difficult situation or in the midst of it, or out of your own despair.
       He is BIGGER than whatever you are going through.)
He will take great delight in you,
     (I know, you feel like you have made a huge mess of things - but God still delights in who you are
       and who you can be, who He created you to be.)
=> This is my favorite part right now:
He will quiet you with His love,
     (Do you, like me, get anxious?
       Are you feeling unsettled or abandoned?
       God wants to calm your anxious thoughts and give you peace.)
He will rejoice over you with singing.
     (Can you believe it?
       He rejoices over you!
       Even though you yell at your kids sometimes
       and don't always have time for your husband
       and you haven't really taken time to pray this week, much less actually open your Bible.)

He loves you because you are you and
HE MADE YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE.

When I forget who I am in Him:
-My failures overwhelm me and make me feel useless.
-Anxieties multiply because I don't feel "good enough".
-My past haunts me.
-Fear keeps me from stepping out and trying new things.
-I give up!

These are the times it is especially important to read my Bible. The times when we feel least like spending time with God are usually when we need it the most. I am especially grateful at these times that I have marked verses in my Bible that are meaningful to me. That makes it easy for me to find where God has spoken to me before.

If you don't know where to start try Psalms.

Redeemed by Big Daddy Weave really spoke to me recently.

The chorus says:

"I am redeemed, You set me free
So I'll shake off these heavy chains
Wipe away every stain, now I'm not who I used to be
I am redeemed, I'm redeemed."

Walking by faith

This is a very challenging time for me. Our youngest has started college and our older children are beginning to step out on their own. I've spent twenty five years raising our family and now I need to find what God is leading me to do with the next twenty five years. I've been anxious and unsettled about the future because I want to see what my life will look like years from now instead of  looking for what God is asking me to do today. I'm living by sight, not by faith.

When I think about living by faith, I think of Abraham’s journey with God which was filled with times when he had to walk by faith. Hebrews 11:1 defines faith this way: "Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen." (NASB)

Abraham's life reveals the way to follow God a day at a time. Only the eyes of faith could see that seemingly impossible things would come to pass in Abraham and Sarah’s lives. I can’t imagine having to leave my home and family to follow God to an undisclosed land. He must have met tremendous  resistance from his family and friends. How many times was he tempted to give up and turn back as the difficulties of the journey overwhelmed him?

Not only did God promise Abraham land, but numerous descendants. Abraham and Sarah were already old. That must have seemed impossible, but Abraham chose to believe God when there was no human way for them to have a child. When they finally had their precious son who restored laughter to their lives, God told Abraham to sacrifice him. The Bible doesn't reveal his internal struggle, but it must have been fierce. Why would God give this child only to take him away? Without Isaac, how would the promise be fulfilled? Abraham trusted God, believing in resurrection long before it had been seen.

Faith wasn’t dependent on anything Abraham had to offer, or on his limited human abilities. Faith depends only on how trustworthy the object of our faith is. God’s promises are always true – He is completely trustworthy and faithful. If we have enough faith, we will trust Him for everything. Because we have a God who is always faithful, we have no need to fear. This requires keeping our eyes on God and not our circumstances. My anxiety can be a thing of the past if I learn to walk by faith.

God had a plan. He knew what was on the horizon even though Abraham couldn’t see what was to come. God revealed His plan to Abraham a little at a time, when the time was right. Abraham trusted and took one step at a time.

"Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord,
And whose trust is the Lord.
For he will be like a tree planted by the water,
That extends its roots by a stream
And will not fear when the heat comes;
But its leaves will be green,
And it will not be anxious in a year of drought
Nor cease to yield fruit." Jeremiah 17:7-8 (NASB)

He has a plan for my life too. And He will reveal His plan as I need to know the details. I can choose to trust and follow Him in faith and help bring His plan to pass, or I can walk by sight and fumble around in anxiety and insecurity hindering God’s plan. It is up to me.

Keith and Kristyn Getty's song By Faith shares how the theme of faith is woven through God's word. The chorus says:

We will stand as children of the Promise.
We will fix our eyes on Him, our soul's reward.
'Til the race is finished and the work is done.
We'll walk by faith and not by sight.

Here is the video of the entire song:

A Better Marriage Requires a Better Me

We live in a microwave culture. We want everything NOW! We eat fast food, and get angry when we are stuck behind someone driving the speed limit. Texting and the internet allow us instant communication. And we want instant results when our lives need to change.

I’m working through Enhancing Your Marriage by Judy Rossi right now with a bunch of ladies over the internet. The strange thing about this study is that we are beginning week 4 and still haven’t learned anything about marriage. I was skeptical at first, but as I have taken time to consider my own spiritual life, I’ve realized that my marriage can’t grow much if I don’t change and grow first.

When I see attitudes and character qualities in my life that need to change, I think I should be able to pray a quick prayer and presto – the fruit of the Spirit will be perfectly lived out. I have spent so many years asking God to change my heart and mind without seeing the results I expected.

OK, until the last couple of years, I was trying to change in my strength instead of trusting God to change me. I still clung to my pride and selfishness. I wanted to change some or only in some areas. That just isn’t how God works. He asks for all of our heart and soul and mind and strength.

As I have learned to yield to Him, I have still been frustrated by how easily I fall into old habits. I still want that quick fix. As I read Exodus this week there was a verse that I hadn’t noticed before. (Does that happen to you too? A verse jumps out at you that you have read a hundred times before and never noticed.)

“Little by little I will drive them out before you, until you have increased enough to take possession of the land.” (23:30) God was going to remove the inhabitants of the Promised Land, but not all at once. If He did, wild animals would have taken over much of the territory. If God worked little by little, the population of the Israelites would increase so they could inhabit all of it.

The same is true of our spiritual lives. If God revealed everything that needed to change at once, we would be overwhelmed and give up. So God works like a sculptor, patiently chipping away at a piece of marble until a masterpiece is revealed. When I look back over the last couple of years, I see how I have changed and grown. No, I am not where I think I should be, but I’m not the person I was either. God continues to work. “He says trust me. If I brought you into this, I’m going to bring you through it. JUST DO AS I COMMAND AND WATCH ME REVEAL MYSELF.” (Judy Rossi)

So I will give God my life and my obedience and will trust Him to change me in His time.

Strength When You Are Weary

 

“Bless the Lord, 
O my soul

and all that is within me, praise His holy name...

Who satisfies your years with good things; 
so that

your youth is renewed like the eagle.”

Psalm 103:1, 5 (NASB)

These verses struck me last week. Wow! God fills my years with good which gives me strength. 

They also reminded me of this passage:

      "Do you not know? 

Have you not heard?

The Everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth

Does not become weary or tired.

His understanding is beyond human reach. 
He gives strength to the weary, and to him who lacks might He increases power. 
Though youths grow weary and tired, and vigorous young men stumble badly,

Yet those who wait for the Lord will gain new strength; 
They will mount up with wings like eagles,

They will run and not get tired,

They will walk and not become weary.”

Isaiah 40:28-31

Humans get tired. We get discouraged. We run out of energy. – That is part of the human condition. We are not created to take on life on our own. Our mortal bodies are weak and prone to wear out.

BUT:

Our infinite, immortal, everlasting Father knows that. IF we will call on Him, He will fill us with the energy and other resources we need to run this race called life well. We will be equipped for every challenge and prepared for the battle. Though we grow weary, He never does.

We do have to slow down long enough to talk to God and let Him fill us. We will have to acknowledge our inability to do everything for ourselves and recognize our dependence on Him; to confess our independence and self-sufficiency, and the PRIDE that keeps us from calling on Him.

  I will have to trust the people God has placed in my life with my heart (PRIDE gets in the way of that too when I don’t want anyone to see my weakness.) so God can use them to build me up. I struggle so much with that. I'm afraid if I let people see the real me with all my insecurities and faults that they won't like me or accept me. (Of course those are the very things that make me me.)

God could have created us to live and work independently of each other, but He didn't. We are created with an innate need for fellowship. He could supernaturally meet all of our needs, but He chooses not too. God often uses the family members and friends He has placed in our lives to encourage and strengthen us. I miss that blessing when I choose not to share my struggles with others.

Are you weary?
What is troubling you?
Turn to Jesus.

The Well - A Place to be Refreshed

 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30 NIV)

I don't know how many times I return to these verses when I have run out of my resources and am worn out. It would seem like after thirty five years of walking with God, I would know better than to try to accomplish everything by my strength; that I would stop to ask God about His plans for my day, instead of plunging ahead with my own. Some days or weeks or occasionally longer I do better, but then life gets busy and I run off ahead of God again - praying He will bless my plans instead of considering His.

When our kids were in school, this time of year was especially hectic. It takes time to settle into a school day and homework routine, fall sports are starting, then there is back to school night and those things the kids need that weren't on the school supply list. 

If you have run out of steam and are running on empty, why not take five minutes to meet Jesus at the well of living water and listen to this song by Casting Crowns. The first time I heard it, it stopped me in my tracks. 

" I have what you need,
But you keep on searchin,
I've done all the work,
But you keep on workin,
When you're runnin on empty,
And you can't find the remedy,
Just come to the well."

Casting Crowns

The Well

I Go To Nature

I don't have much to say today. This quote expresses exactly the way I feel when I get outside. Even sitting on the deck with the traffic noise and houses, calms me and helps restore my equilibrium. Too often, I am so caught up in all of the things that need to get done that I don't slow down to notice what is around me. Those are the days that I am most anxious and frazzled. I need time to rest and be refreshed. We all do.

Creativity

What does it mean to be creative? If you don't have an artistic bone in your body, can you still be creative?

 

 I don't think it takes artistic ability to be creative. God is creative, and since we are made in His image, we are too.

Is there a tune that bubbles up when it's quiet? Are there images that come to you as you read God's word? Do you write about what God says to you? - You are being creative.

When an image comes to me as I read, I try to capture it in my journal. These sketches aren't very good, but it doesn't matter. They really aren't intended to be shared.

  Luci Swindoll explains creativity this way: “Being creative is to find your own voice inside yourself, to identify your own ideas and aspirations.  It means singing the song that’s in your heart, to your own melody.  You’re the only one who can hear it, because it is coming from God.  If you look at this song with your intellect, it goes away because it doesn’t respond to your mind; it responds to your heart.  The mind turns it cold, and it quits singing.  These are the pinnacles of experience that caused the great masters of art to produce what they did.  These personal moments give the greatest happiness and greatest wisdom.” ( Life! Celebrate It)

It's hard to find that creative spark when we are always busy and bombarded with noise and information. I have to slow down and be quiet, and quit thinking about what I need to do or the things that are troubling me. Unfortunately, those moments often happen in the middle of the night when I can't sleep. Maybe that is actually a good thing. I do lose some sleep, but the house is quiet and there isn't anything else demanding my attention.

"Created in the image of God, we are meant to brim over with creativity...
All image-bearers of God were intended to overflow with effervescent life, stirring and spilling with God-given vision." Beth Moore, Get Out of That Pit

So pick up a marker, sing a song, write a poem, do a dance and find freedom in discovering who God made you to be and expressing your creative side.

Psalms 40:3 NIV
He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear and put their trust in the Lord.

In The Garden

As I sat on the deck a couple of weeks ago, this hymn came to me:

 

In The Garden by C. Austin Miles
photo by Kristi Blackwood

At the time, I didn't know what God was beginning to do in our 18 year old's heart. (She wrote about it in her blog post, Changing My Plans). She came to me last week and said that she believed God was calling her to withdraw from the college she was enrolled in. (I was ready to spend two weeks shopping and packing to take her to this out of state school.) Instead she will enroll in the nursing program at our community college in preparation for the mission field. This plan allows her to graduate debt free so she won't have to work to pay off loans before she can pursue God's call.

Change isn't easy for me. I had just gotten adjusted to her leaving, now I have to readjust to having her home (which is not a bad thing). There is time to get her enrolled in fall classes, but not much. It will be a scramble to take care of admissions, enrolling in classes and getting books. I need those quiet moments with God every day to respond to whatever change the day brings with grace and to live with the peace and joy God desires for me.

I still love the old hymns I grew up singing. They tend to speak to my heart in quiet moments. There is a beauty and poetry in the lyrics that is missing in much of today's worship music.

Finishing Well

My dear friend Anne Marie writes about homeschooling, family life, and her love for God on her blog Future Flying Saucers. She also shares the Bible lessons she prepares for her AWANA club.

I wrote about the challenges of homeschooling our strong willed daughter and my thoughts as we approach graduation for a guest post on her site.

Here is the link:
Finishing Well

Revealing My Heart

I'm ashamed to admit how often I am unkind to and critical of my family. Usually it is a tone of voice that says you're bothering me, but that is all it takes to reveal my heart. If I am really living for God and surrendering everything to Him, I should not be thinking things that are critical and unkind. Yes, think, because before anything comes out of my mouth, it is in my mind. Even if there is nothing wrong with the words I am saying, my tone of voice and body language reveal my heart. If the things I am focusing on and thinking about are godly, then the words that I speak should be also.

“Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life.” Proverbs 4:23

“The good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth what is good; and the evil man out fo the evil treasure brings forth what is evil; for the mouth speaks from that which fills the heart.” Luke 6:45

What we think affects how we live!

It may seem like a few careless words don’t matter, but I still carry scars from unkind words spoken to me in my childhood. Words go deep and lodge themselves in the hidden places of our minds. They reappear when something happens to cause us to doubt ourselves.

It isn’t just our words that are affected by the condition of our hearts. I very easily fall into the trap of insecurity and feeling like I have no value when I drift away from God and His word. The further I fall into the trap, the more convinced I become that no one cares. As a result, I isolate myself from the people around me and continue to spiral downward. When that happens, I need to get back into the word of God and see what He says about me and reach out to show someone else God’s love.

God’s promises to me:

      He loves me

      He pursues a relationship with me

      His love casts out fear

      He sings over me

      He delights in me

      All things are possible in Him

       I can do anything through Him

      His plans are for my good, to give me a future and hope

      He has already planned good things for me to do.

It takes courage and faith to trust God and step out of the dark and I am learning to turn to Him more quickly when I fall into unhealthy thinking.

Lord, I pray that "the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.” (Psalm 19:14)

Pretending

Angel

Jedi Knight

Hairdresser

Have you ever watched children engaged in imaginative play. I always enjoy seeing the world through their eyes. Over the years we have had explorers, hair dressers, Olympic skaters and skiers, Mary watching over baby Jesus, mechanics, computer scientists (before we owned a computer), along with a host of other characters in our home. This kind of pretending is healthy and important for children as they learn who they are and where they fit in the world around them. Adults pretend too. Much of that pretending isn't healthy.

So many of us spend our lives pretending. (I know I have.) Pretending everything is OK, pretending we’re happy, pretending life doesn’t hurt. But pretending isn’t really living. We hide in the shadows hoping no one will find out who we really are. God invites us to dance the dance of life with Him. Life can be one exciting and glorious adventure. (There will be pain and disappointment too – that’s just part of our fallen world.) The song Offering (Paul Baloche) includes this line: “There are no shadows in Your presence”. If we are going to really live our lives as God intends us to, we can’t hide in the shadows. We have to step out and dance with the King of the Universe.

Jeremiah 1:5 says “Before I formed you I knew you, before you were born I set you apart, I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”

This is God’s call to Jeremiah. I believe it is His call to each of His children. He may not have appointed us as prophets, but He knows us intimately and has set each of us apart for a purpose.

Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Phillipians 2:15 “so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe”

Phillipians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”

God, give us the courage to let go of all the lies we have believed and move beyond our fears. Teach us to trust You and see ourselves as you see us. God teach us to dance instead of hiding in the shadows.

(In Do You Think I’m beautiful? Angela Thomas compares our walk with God to a dance.  I highly recommend this book as well as her Bible study with the same title.)

Originally published November 13, 2009

I’m Beautiful (and so are you)

I am beautiful!  God says it so it is true!  I can’t always see it, but that doesn’t change the fact that He calls me beautiful.  (So has my husband for nearly 30 years, I have just never been sure I believed him.)  Why is it so hard to dig through the clutter and the voices in my head to see myself as God sees me and hear Him call me beautiful?  Why am I more ready to believe the world and Satan than my heavenly Daddy who loves me more than I can imagine?

There are certainly days that I don’t see my beauty, but that doesn’t change it.

When I’m feeling out of shape and unattractive - I’m still beautiful.

When I’m tired and my eyes are sad and baggy - I’m still beautiful.

When I’m disappointed in my husband and ugly towards him - I’m still beautiful.

When I’m yelling at the kids - I’m still beautiful.

When I feel like a failure - I’m still beautiful.

When I’m lonely and feel like no one cares - I’m still beautiful.

There is nothing that can change the Truth.  God says I’m beautiful - whether I believe it or not.

What else does He say about me that I haven’t believed?  What does He want to use my hands and feet to do that I’m not doing because I am too busy feeling sorry for myself?  I long to surround myself with beauty and be content with what God has given me. I need to slow down, be still, and listen for His voice.

(Do You Think I’m beautiful? by Angela Thomas explores the things that keep us from seeing ourselves as God does.  I highly recommend it as well as her Bible study with the same title.)

Originally published July 15, 2008.

Forever God's Child

This song has made a profound impression on me as our church's worship team has been preparing it for a future Sunday morning. It mirrors my journey with God. Here is the first verse:

Broken and lost you found me
Though hurt had been my way you healed my life.
Called as a child and righteous
You broke the power of sin and freed my heart.
(Find the whole song here.)

I hope it blesses you as well.

Always Loved

Our small group is studying 3:16 by Max Lucado. We are enjoying going back to one of the first verses most of us memorized and revisiting some basic truths.

“For God so loved the world that He sent His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.” (John 3:16)

Last night we looked at the permanence of this promise. Once we are God’s, we are always His.

He says:

No one can snatch us out of His hand. (John 10:28)

Nothing can separate us from His love. (Romans 8:35-39)

He will never leave us. (Hebrews 13:5)

Why does God remind us so often that His love is unconditional and eternal?

One answer was: “Because He knows us.”

The next was: “Because we are feeble and fickle”

We hear so clearly the voices of the past and of Satan telling us we are not good enough. We feel our own insecurity and doubt that a perfect God could love the mess we are. I started thinking about why those are the voices we hear instead of the voice of our Daddy telling us we are loved and have just the personality and abilities we need to become all He has planned for us. I think we miss God’s voice because He speaks to the innermost part of our souls in a whisper. Our world is so full of noise and distractions and our lives are so busy that we can’t hear the sweet voice of our Savior. Isn’t it more meaningful to have someone sit next to us and speak quietly in intimate conversation, than to shout across a crowded room?

God loves you more than you will ever know. He longs for you to quiet yourself and cuddle up next to Him so He can talk with you. Will you take a few minutes to be alone, open His word and let Him speak to you through it?

My Song

All of creation declares the glory of God:

 

1 Chronicles 16:33

“Then the trees of the forest will sing, they will sing for joy before the Lord, 

for he comes to judge the earth.”

 Psalm 65:13

“The meadows are covered with flocks and the valleys are mantled with grain; 

they shout for joy and sing.”

 Psalm 98:8

“Let the rivers clap their hands, Let the mountains sing together for joy."

 Psalm 69:4

“Let heaven and earth praise Him, The seas and all that move in them.”

Psalm 19:1

“The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands.”

Just as all creation praises its glorious maker, we were created to glorify the Lord. Each of us has been given a song to sing.

"He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear and put their trust in the Lord." - Psalm 40:3

"Sing to the Lord a new song; sing to the Lord, all the earth." - Psalm 96:1

Its melody, harmony and sometimes dissonance are revealed in the way we live our lives. We choose to let God’s glory shine or we silence His song as we become preoccupied with the demands of life.

Slow Down

 Do you ever get tired of the busyness of our modern lives? Phones buzzing, the internet calling, always rushing to do the next thing. Never taking the time to slow down and rest. I sure do.

God's plan isn't for us to race around trying to get ahead. He calls us to slow down and spend time with Him.

 “Take time to rest by the wayside, for I am not in a hurry. A leisurely pace accomplishes more than hurried striving. When you rush you forget who you are and whose you are.” Sarah Young, Jesus Calling

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30

He loves us more than we can imagine and wants the best for us.

“I want you to experience how wide and long and high and deep is My love for you, so that you can know My love that surpasses knowledge. This vast ocean  of love cannot be measured or explained, but it can be experienced.” Sarah Young, Jesus Calling

As we slow down and rest in God's love and His plan for us, we learn to give Him our worry and frantic thoughts.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things.” Philippians 4:6-8

Jesus came to trade His sinless life for our sins so we can enjoy God's love and live in relationship to Him. He offers us a trade:

Trade our worrying and anxious thoughts for His joy, peace and grace.

Trade our sour attitudes and grudges for His forgiveness, peace and joy.

Trade our selfish pride and stubborn hard heart for His heart that gives freely without thinking about it’s own interests.

Trade our thinking about today’s circumstances for His eternal perspective.

Trade our sin for His righteousness.

The Weaver

In 3:16, Max Lucado tells of watching a weaver set up her loom and begin to work. Then he makes this comparison:
"...Christ in like manner, weaves his story. Every person is a thread, every moment a color, every era a pass of the shuttle. Jesus steadily interweaves the embroidery of humankind.
 'My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,' says the Lord, 'And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.' (Isaiah 55:8 NLT)
 A root menaing of the word translated thoughts is 'artistic craftsmanship'. As if God says 'My artistry is far beyond anything you could imagine'."

This reminded me of a story Corrie Ten Boom used to tell. As she talked, she held a small tapestry, but all the audience could see was the tangled mess on the back. All we can see of our lives are the threads of our own experience. Often these don't make sense and we feel like those tangled threads. What we can't see is God's plan in all of those things. As Corrie finishes speaking she turns over the tapestry to reveal the beautiful picture on the other side. Each of us is a masterpiece. Unlike anyone else. There is a purpose and a plan for all of those messy, tangled things we go through (Jeremiah 29:11).

Life is But a Weaving (The Tapestry Poem)

Image courtesy of Piyachok Thawornmat at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Corrie Ten Boom

My life is but a weaving
Between my God and me.
I cannot choose the colors
He weaveth steadily.
Oft' times He weaveth sorrow;
And I in foolish pride
Forget He sees the upper
And I the underside.
Not 'til the loom is silent
And the shuttles cease to fly
Will God unroll the canvas
And reveal the reason why.
The dark threads are as needful
In the weaver's skillful hand
As the threads of gold and silver
In the pattern He has planned
He knows, He loves, He cares;
Nothing this truth can dim.
He gives the very best to those
Who leave the choice to Him.

You are loved

Reflections

 I love the juxtaposition of old and new in cities like Boston. Here, it was the reflection of the old in the new that caught my eye.

It made me think about what I am reflecting. What is it that people see in me? Do I reflect the hurried, harried pace I often try to keep? Or is it the strain of my daily struggles that shows on in my countenance? I'm afraid it is rarely the love, joy, and peace of my Savior that is reflected.

(Trinity Church, Boston)











                                      

If I am living truly surrendered to God, it should be the fruit of the Spirit that people see in me. God's presence allows us to live beyond our circumstances. I'll still be aggravated by difficult people, and discouraged at times, and just weary. I do have a tendency to be worried and anxious too. Will I give all of that to God so people will see Him when they look at me?

I'm working on it. Though as I learn to surrender everything to God, I've just been grumpier. (Hormones may be partly to blame.) Satan doesn't want me to be a reflection of Jesus, so he tries to get me to react poorly. It is my family that receives the brunt of this. It frustrates me and makes me want to quit trying, but I won't.

(Old South Meeting House, Boston)

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control ; against such things there is no law." Galations 5:22-23

Finding purpose in my days

 My Purpose

As our children have become busy with jobs, interests and activities, and have left for college,  I have found myself with time on my hands.  I need to know God’s purpose for my life, so I can find the best way to fill my days.

God’s answer to my cry: “To glorify Me.”

But how?  God’s answer was “by giving my very best to the task at hand and to quit worrying about a year from now, a week from now, or even an hour from now.”  So I will do the laundry, the grocery shopping, the cooking and cleaning, the planning and the homeschooling to the glory of God. In Taking Up Your Cross, Tricia McCary Rhodes,  answered my heart’s cry in a way I didn’t expect.

“The reason we don’t come to God when we’re busy, or tired, or
emotionally distraught is because we believe we come to give
instead of to get.  We see quiet times as our Christian responsibility
and therefore we must do them when we are strong and in good
spiritual condition.  But God doesn’t call us to Himself for what we
might bring, but that we might know the delight of finding our
deepest needs met in all that He is.  What really glorifies Him are
empty, needy people being filled and made whole by His
goodness.”

“When the driving passion of our life is to find joy and delight in the
pursuit of God’s glory, then we have discovered our reason for being. “

I believe part of glorifying God is showing others His glory.  Again, I have struggled with how to do that.  When Moses had been in God’s presence his face shone so brightly that the Israelites were frightened and he had to veil his face.  I think as we spend more time in God’s presence, His glory will overflow from our lives onto those around us.

I guess I will keep pursuing God and wait for Him to show me what to do next.

(Tricia’s website has a lot of articles and devotional materials http://www.soulatrest.com/index.html)

(Originally written July 3, 2008, but I am struggling with this again as I work myself out of a job.)